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  1. Goldsmith said over the past five years gangs have recruited more than 3000 members, a 51 per cent increase. At the same time, there had been a significant escalation in gang-related violence, public intimidation and shootings, with violent crime up 33 per cent.

    Mitchell said New Zealanders deserve to feel safe in their homes, communities and public places.

    “For too long gangs have been allowed to behave as if they are above the law. There is no tolerance for this behaviour and these new laws will support Police to take action against it.”

    Mitchell said the ban on gang patches would apply to funerals/tangi and although funeral services were always emotional events, that doesn’t give gang members the right to disrupt and take over public places.

    The legislation was expected to be passed into law by the end of the year.


    Seems to be going well. Oh the law won’t get done until the end of the year, meanwhile another shot dead outside Glengarry wines. Gollies favourite wine shop. Amazing how much wine you can drink when its free.
    Glengarry wouldn’t complain despite having the film.



    • Wayne Brown is an old coot
      He is 77.
      would be 82 at the end if he got a second term.

      Brown is all mouth and no trousers,
      He has bugger all power but cops the flak anyway.
      the power is with the CCOs, the Executive and he only has 1 vote in 21 on council.
      the Town Clerks of old had more power than him.
      At least Tim Shadbolt knew how to have fun with the role and did not take himself too seriously .

      Brown is not the firebrand of 20 years ago when he was on DHBs.
      He was even fading badly in his second term as Mayor of the Far North and that ended in 2013

      The problem lies with the issue as stated:-
      …Auckland is the only region in New Zealand that doesn’t control its own LTP….
      LTP here is Land Transport Plan

      When the Satan-soaked unholy trifecta of johnny keys/Dildo bagman Joyce/fat guts Hide set up the super duper City in 2010 they deliberately set it up that council had little control .
      Council collected rates then handed it over to CCOs.
      The CCOs have the power.
      Council just does spreadsheets , a bit of MS Project, and buys lunch in the city.

      The CCOs are run by boards.
      notional – with no expertise at all in local body (duh, their fault) thought they could stack the Boards with ‘their folk’.
      But at Inception it was stacked with lefties and crackheads.
      This hold has not been broken and will not be.
      eg. AT- Auckland Transport – is stacked with car hating zealots

      The stupidity of the Satan -soaked trifecta shows through.
      The Central based Auckland Council on the Isthmus was leaning conservative.
      The north Shore was conservative.
      But when West Auckland (Waitakere) and South Auckland were added in the net effect was a left leaning city .
      Votes accordingly. and lots of those South Auckland rentals have 6 plus votes and would never lean towards or even look Right .
      did you dildos not know that 💩💩💊

      So Auckland Council collects rates and then by statute has to hand the money over the CCOs (Council Controlled Operation by name, but in fact they are more autonomous than not).
      CCOs include Akl transport (out of control as any 8 year old can work out)
      Watercare (stodgy and slow, unresponsive, while grandstanding that it does a bit of its job, self praise and press releases of announcements )

      A facilities/properties CCO that after 14 years has not sorted out where the stadia (stadiums) should be . What happens to Eden Park, Western Springs, Mt Smart. Where will speedway/stockcars go? Will there be a velodrome.
      Um, yeah, we are feminists and we dont understand the boys need for sport, so we will have coffee mornings, and afternoons, and breakfasts then go to yoga….

      Notional fucks up Local government at every opportunity.
      I have seen Simeon Brown as the only hope after as succession of shit useless Notional local Govt Ministers (Anne Tolley. tummy tied Paula, Chris Tremaine [who ?? ] Peseta Sam ?? ) but I fear he will be subject to luxon’s public bullying if he goes off script.
      luxon will chalk up his bullying and subjugation of capable MPs as another step closer to the media.
      Newsflash. They hate ya baldy !!

      The Auckland city fiasco reminds me of the RMA.
      Liebour started the RMA pre 1990. Bolger via Soimon Upton picked it up and passed it in 1991.
      Then they bleat about it ever since.
      The Auckland NOT super city was a fiasco by notional (what of johnny keys was not ? ) and they set it up that council to collect money (rates) and give it over to CCOs and then had no say in how the money was spend.

      The mayor of Auckland is still a largely ceremonial affair.
      Way more than it ever was before the Michael Bassett shit storm deforms of 1989.
      Mayor Robbie had more power and more say 50 years ago that Wayne Brown does and Robbie was only Mayor of the very central Auckland area
      Notional fucked up
      But they wont have the guts to fix it
      and luxon does not have the IQ to work it out.

      FYI. Penny Bright was correct about Watercare (predecessor Metrowater.
      But they are nowhere near as bad as Akl transport

      Wayne Brown is all words;
      And in any event, he has no control over what the COs do as that is the way it was set up in 2010 by the notional/ACT cock up mob.
      so AT will do what it likes.
      Notional will continue to blow hot air .
      The fiasco they set up in 2010 is a mess and needs a complete reset.
      At this point in time there does not appear to be anyone with the nouse to do that and if they stood up and said the right thing to do , low IQ luxon would pounce on them and ridicule them to his ‘mates’ in media .

      Such is the state of ao tear zooland today.
      Now, about Thailand ….



        • I suspect he is running on glory days .
          Past any prime.

          He had to know what he was in for
          -media abuse and lies – default position
          -he only gets 1 vote or casting vote in a deadlock situation;
          he has been a Mayor for 2 terms before; he had to know.
          In Far North he threw his weight around – small distributed place – that is why he was defeated.

          the council has little power except on menial things like dog registration – the sort of things you can empire build with- like Water resources and roading – are locked in CCOs.

          Given council is about
          Roading footpaths
          libraries (should be halving and going online else it is a welfare centre and cocks in frocks turn up anyway they are usually aggressive due to testosterone !)
          parks and pools
          dog rego
          rubbish – contracted out
          Water, waste water sewage

          with much of it allocated to CCOs or contracted out this means the far too many council staff waste time on
          -paper shuffling
          -drinking coffee
          -playing office politics
          -pushing maori separatism
          -air headed issues that should be left to university students under 22 years old.

          Sack half of them a productivity would likely improve.
          The Twitter test!

          The cock up that The 2010 merger did was no-one loses their job.
          so there was zero savings on Salary
          And worse, because it was a larger organisation (sic) they then hired more people ….because it was a larger organisation;
          and left a bunch of people to fluff about.

          There was no proper plan in 2010
          the mediocre one they had failed on day 1
          Len Brown was in and straight to the Ngati Whatua room.

          I would say the bureaucrats are holding their breathe until Brown goes
          He may not stand again in 2025.
          He will be 79 then .

          A contender is the Deputy Mayor – married to Peter goodfellow of the notionals- and she has never seen a goddamn thing she does to want to throw OPM -other peoples money -at !! 💲💲💲💲
          with a rich hubby (inherited) she has no financial restraint
          She is a bimbo. an old bimbo.

          the future does not look bright

          And Notional moron No 3, get boosted bishop, wants to do more council mergers such as wellington – in serious doodoo – because
          “Auckland has been such a success”

          To call Chris bishop a cretin does a disservice to actual cretins.



    • “Scientists have been growing increasingly concerned by the spread and evolution of H5N1 avian flu, which has killed tens of millions of poultry birds in four years and been detected in two dozen countries.”

      H5N1 is the same swine flu we had back in about 2009 if I am not wrong. It was a nasty flu, I was sick with it for almost a fortnight and took a couple of months to fully recover. I had had my flu vaccine a couple of weeks before becoming sick and have not had another flu jab or the flu (including the fake covid 19) since.

      H5N1 has not killed millions of poultry birds around the world it is humans who have slaughtered countless livestock in an hysterical reaction trying to wipe out the disease which is clearly impossible because it keeps coming back. No doubt this latest stupid scare story is just another attempt to get the weak minded to accept yet more jabs and “follow the science.”



      • The wanton slaughter of our ‘food supply’ is all by design. The excuse is a made up virus. The result is to drive independent farmers off of the land, so corporates and psychopaths can buy it and control our protein intake from natural sources to synthetic. All about control. They want us dead or sick and weak.



        • The illusion & hallucinations of grandeur of controlling the world..

          There use to be mental asylums with padded rooms for such people.
          – – – – – – – — —– – – – – — – – — – – – — – – –
          Those labs being extended in NZ, supposedly because we have many sheep.
          Then here in New Zealand there is testing for vaccines into livestock with a protein.

          ….. Research is now focused on identifying the right antigens that will inhibit the growth and function of methanogens in the rumen.
          In December 2019, an international panel was engaged to review the vaccine programme and confirmed the value and appropriateness of this research approach. ….

          Do you trust them?

          ….. Vaccination of cattle {& sheep} with a methanogen protein produces specific antibodies in the saliva which are stable in the rumen ….

          Sounds like how to produce a “Spike Protein” and this too will be “safe & efficacious”.

          This is building even more now, as 100’s of millions of dollars are going into this, and looking for more international money support..

          To make an animal change its saliva seems to me more than a reaction from the usual & old fashion take of vaccines.
          Would it be in truth a form of gene editing? using the knowledge gained from mRNA vaxxes?

          Concepts of this whether gene modification, or gene editing of this is being rolled out under the auspices of Judith Collins to be accepted into legislation at the end of next year.

          Still worth a quick read, of even the just the first paragraph, though paywalled for the rest of it.
          I copy pasted, but it attached warnings of copyright breaches.

          Found another link showing how this is all supposedly benign circa 11th March 2024

          …. “We’ve seen the real-life impact of this, such as the importance of previous mRNA research leaving us in a position to rapidly react to a pandemic. …..

          Seems to the full speech in the bullet points of Judith Collins speech here.

          This seems to enable mRNA vaccines in New Zealand in many & various forms.
          Levering off Climate Change, Agriculture, Methane Carbon inhibiting etc. to approving more mRNA into humans.

          The problem is could a trust a Joseph Mengeles & his approving government departments, supposedly having all the checks & balances with enforcers,. ….yeahhh nahh;hh ……



        • “There’s a lot of lipid nanoparticles, and some are very “self assembling.”
          The very same ones that were in the bio-weapon and that they are now introducing via air, water and food.
          These fuckers need taking out.



  2. A correspondent writes:

    Back in February the wifes aunt and uncle tested ‘positive’ for the coof again. Both are fully jabbed and boosted and have caught the covid multiple times in the past three years despite all the jibby jabs. They hid themselves away for six weeks only emerging when Easter rolled around so that they could go to church on Easter Sunday. They turned up that Sunday in masks. Later that day there was a family get together where they both attended in masks. They managed twenty minutes before they cleared off again with fear in their eyes as one of the family had a bit of a sore throat. Apart from myself everyone else attending were fully jabbed and boosted but many of them are still testing.
    They re-emerged last Sunday for another visit to church, masked of course. I then found out today that both had another covid jab yesterday and today both of them are not feeling well and are staying indoors.

    The Clown show continues



      • yea but just remember if trump gets convicted in one of the many political witch hunts then he’ll lose the vote from many independants and most likely lose.

        even the betting odds are in bidens favour, imo its 50/50 and if i were to bet id put money on biden cuz face it this round of election fuckery will be off the charts.
        usa is fucked



  3. Even after Robertson borrowing the $100 billion this guy thinks it is OK because the state debt is still only 20% of GDP. He is totally wrong or is playing with numbers.


    The answer is he is wrong, according to the World bank figures

    But I do agree with him with this statement ;

    “First there is the manner in which the cuts are being made. Putting senior management in charge means that – surprise, surprise – not many senior managers are losing their jobs, despite the recent bloat in those areas.”



    • they changed the way the debt is measured during robbos time as finance minister, it went from 36?% to 20% overnight when it came into effect.
      he then hid more debt via the likes of kianga ora etc.

      just remember that his role model daddy was a fraudster.



  4. Talk about corruption:

    Biden’s Interior department has *off the books* meeting with liberal dark money group funded by foreign billionaire, conceals it from the public, then does everything they want. In this case, cancelling critical mining in the US. To benefit China. (“Off the books” meetings are all the rage within democracy it seems, even in little old NZ).




    • Whether off or on the books, that international money will swoop in as mentioned in the above comment thread.
      They will figure that it would be easy to apply mandatory vaccines to tens of millions in New Zealand, across Australia, & the USA,

      All the cattle are geared up with National Animal Identification and Tracing (NAIT) which is used to enforce farmers Person in Charge of Animals (PICA) to to be responsible & record all the movement of the individual bovines (cattle), like having a passport,

      Jenny Cameron Chief Transformation Officer-Fit for a Better World – [NZ] Ministry for Primary Industries | Executive leader focused on systems change
      ….. 🔬The venture announced on 11 April by Agriculture Minister Todd McClay will roll up more than 15 years of pioneering research into one entity, to support a stronger focus on vaccine development and attract international funding to help deliver a world-first solution to market.

      From Todd McClay, MP Agriculture, 9 APRIL 2024
      …… “These new shareholders join the founding shareholders of ANZCO, Fonterra, Rabobank, Ravensdown, Silver Fern Farms and Synlait, alongside the Crown.
      “This will take the overall investment in AgriZeroNZ to $183 million over the joint venture’s first four years.
      Fifty percent of this funding is Crown investment. …..
      ….. commitment of New Zealand businesses to help get emission reduction tools into the hands of farmers sooner. ……
      …….. “Meeting our climate change obligations ……..


      Soon another stage which was postponed, but is enforced in Europe, is to have all sheep in the system.

      Woe betide any Person in Charge of Animals (PICA) who does not comply as all governmental agencies will be stamping on your face with fines, lawfare, etc..

      The pursuit of controlling the public in New Zealand, framing the narrative continues by supposed soft soaping on the Covid Inquiry so the mRNA vaccines can be used on NZ. livestock, & continued into humans.
      They know what they have hidden, and only release the truth, to be ahead of the game, to cover the next stage of their systematic lying.



    • Cu;rious :— Some good points as those devious ones figure that some things are becoming known, so are front footing it as I touched on in my last sentence above.
      However it goes to show, the ones in power, like Ardern knew, & betrayed the public.
      The Cpvid Commission should also be considering & exposing the evidence of the traitors to the NZ public but they will not.
      As mentioned above, more Cattle & Sheep need to be put into their controlling systems.

      A controlled framing & narrative from the NYT.
      Diana West once said, “Beware of anyone claiming to be from the inside who doesn’t tell you anything you don’t already know”.

      Vaccine Injuries [parsing the New York Times article\
      17 mins : 5th May, April, 2024 : Dr. John Campbell

      However this is just a set up, for the authorities to frame & avail themselves of a fall back position.
      Dr, John Campbell in his earnest is really blind to how they are glossing over this as the authorities to save their skins.
      So they do not have to come clean about what they knew, when the knew, as their loyalties are only to their own back side.
      He is close, but then again I figure he can not really say, even if Dr. J C figures it out that is just putting glitter on a toxic turd.

      The New York Times article is here, Not paywalled but one needs to register either by face book, google or apple.

      …. The rise of the anti-vaccine movement has made it difficult for scientists, in and out of government, to candidly address potential side effects, some experts said.
      Much of the narrative on the purported dangers of Covid vaccines is patently false, or at least exaggerated, cooked up by savvy anti-vaccine campaigns.

      Questions about Covid vaccine safety are core to Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s presidential campaign.
      Citing debunked theories about altered DNA, Florida’s surgeon general has called for a halt to Covid vaccination in the state.

      “The sheer nature of misinformation, the scale of misinformation, is staggering, and anything will be twisted to make it seem like it’s not just a devastating side effect but proof of a massive cover-up,” said Dr. Joshua Sharfstein, a vice dean at Johns Hopkins University. ….

      Yes Doctor Hatchard is onto Ardern’s traitorous murdering & injuring of New Zealanders.
      “Yep, yep, It is what it is.! ! !”



      • Do NN and his co-conspirators carrying on the genocide jab cover-up not realise NZ is not an isolated backwater now we have the internet? Overseas has been acknowledging the damage caused for months if not years now. How do National, etc think they can treat NZers all like mushrooms – keep us in the dark and feed us bullshit? How long before someone in “authority” admits to the vax being a HEALTH FAILURE!!!! and officially cancels the boosters? Do they really believe we the people continue to swallow their bunkum and they can blame it on the “system” without taking responsibility?!!



  5. This old lady handed her bank card to the teller and said “I would like to withdraw $10”. The teller told her “for withdrawals less than $100, please use the ATM.

    The old lady wanted to know why… The teller returned her bank card and irritably told her “these are the rules, please leave if there is no further matter. There is a line of customers behind you”.

    The old lady remained silent for a few seconds and handed her card back to the teller and said “please help me withdraw all the money I have.” The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down and respectfully told her “you have $300,000 in your account but the bank doesn’t have that much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come back again tomorrow?

    The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately. The teller told her any amount up to $3000. “Well please let me have $3000 now.” The teller kindly handed $3000 very friendly and with a smile to her.

    The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2990 back into her account.

    The moral of this story is….
    Don’t be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning skills.



  6. “Zionism is a political program for the conquest of the world…Zionism destroyed Russia by violence as a warning to other nations. It is destroying the United States through bankruptcy, as Lenin advised. Zionism wants another world war if necessary to enslave the people. Our manpower is scattered all over the world. Will we be destroyed from within or will we wake up in time to prevent it?”
    Henry H. Klein (April 10, 1879 – July 18, 1955) was an anti-Communist anti-Zionist Jewish attorney who converted to Christianity and exposed what he called the Jewish World conspiracy, said, “Communists control not only our government but our politics, our labor organizations, our agriculture, our mines, our industries, our war plants, and our armed encampments…. Antisemitism is a racket”.
    In 1976, a Jewish staffer to powerful New York Senator Jacob Javits named Harold Rosenthal spoke openly and defiantly about the “One World Jewish Conspiracy”.
    “Rosenthal in exposing certain aspects of the inner invisible world of Jewry, reveals the modes and tactics Jews have used in destroying Christian civilization and covertly attaining control over our lives and government”.




    • You will get a very stern letter from the ADL, Francis 😲

      If you do not cease and desist Mossad will pay you a visit
      and make you an offer you cant refuse

      do you have a VPN?

      The Mossad can even get here on NZ passports
      If caught out in illegal activity johnny keys can whisk them out of the country
      It is good to be King
      it is also good to be the boss of the SIS !!!
      with a jewish mum.
      Ask Taika Waititi/Cohen

      The Israeli secret service Mossad has been accused of conducting an intelligence-gathering operation in New Zealand which was unearthed because of February’s Christchurch earthquake.
      The 2004 Israel–New Zealand passport scandal was an incident of passport fraud in July 2004 that led New Zealand to take diplomatic sanctions against Israel. High-level contacts between the two countries were suspended after two Israeli citizens suspected of being Mossad agents, Uriel Kelman and Eli Cara, were caught trying to fraudulently acquire a New Zealand passport using the identity of a man with cerebral palsy.
      Prime Minister Helen Clark declared that New Zealand government viewed the acts carried out by Kelman and Cara as “not only utterly unacceptable but also a breach of New Zealand sovereignty and international law.”

      You can be damn sure they never stopped this activity.

      Helen Clark is a shiksa so they dont care about her
      Mossad dont care about feelings
      or the law.



      • The Israelis have a habit of shitting on friendly nations. Helen Clark in 2004 said:

        …..”“Israeli agents caught in an unsuccessful assassination attempt in Jordan in 1997 were found to be carrying fraudulent Canadian passports,”…….

        I have zero time for the low-life Hamas & IMO anyone who shills for Palestine is fucked in the head but Israel sure has an unusual way of treating its allies.



        • Israel and the USA
          What a combo.

          Best to be on cool and distant terms from these people that a ‘fake friend’

          They will shit on you anyway.
          We get actual free trade with China but not US.
          Russia supplied Europa Service stations with refined fuel from the 1930s into the 1960s.
          no nonsense.
          Europa was owned by Todd Family so an independent. Not one of the seven sisters
          France 24 did a good doco on the Seven Sisters corruption circa 2007. Dutch, US, UK.

          Then BP decided to supply in the 1960s after 30 years of Russian oil; then of course screwed them – honest English !! – and created a buyout situation.

          The USS Liberty incident

          was an attack on a United States Navy technical research ship (spy ship), USS Liberty, by Israeli Air Force jet fighter aircraft and Israeli Navy motor torpedo boats, on 8 June 1967, during the Six-Day War.[2]

          The combined air and sea attack killed 34 crew members (naval officers, seamen, two marines, and one civilian NSA employee), wounded 171 crew members, and severely damaged the ship.[3] At the time, the ship was in international waters…

          Israel apologized for the attack, saying that the USS Liberty had been attacked in error after being mistaken for an Egyptian ship………….Others, including survivors of the attack, have rejected these conclusions and maintain that the attack was deliberate.[7][8]
          Keep your enemies closer!!!



  7. Bet he’s an import? Denied access to a bar due to close. Sounds like he had a handgun in his man bag?

    Police have released images of an “extremely dangerous” man investigators are seeking after a fatal shooting in Auckland’s Ponsonby late last night.

    A man was found dead outside an address on the Central Auckland street after “reports of a firearm being discharged”.

    Detective Inspector Chris Barry said the man being sought had been turned away from a bar before the shooting as it was closing.

    A group of four people, including the victim, exited a parked car on Ponsonby Rd at around 10.15pm and walked in the man’s direction, Barry said.

    “Police have now identified the man as the offender”.

    Police believe the weapon used in the shooting was concealed in the side bag the man carried, Barry said. He added it was unclear what the man’s motivation was.



  8. Winston Peters
    On Wednesday last week Māori Party MP Mariameno Kapa-Kingi gave a general debate speech in the House with this opening sentence, “No matter my words today, the Government will not waver in its mission to exterminate Māori.”

    She went on to say, “The theory of the Minister is that Oranga Tamariki’s governing principles should be colour-blind, which is just another word for white supremacy, because to say we are all one people is really to say we should all be white people.”

    And “The Government’s reasons to take it away can be summed up in a few short words: racism and Pakeha supremacy.”

    These ignorant and offensive accusations leave little to the imagination about the mindset of Kapa-Kingi, her party, and the rest of her fellow cultural travellers – she doesn’t care about what she said, how offensive it is, or how bereft of fact it is.

    Kapa-Kingi is either dangerously ignorant or she believes what she said is true. The most frightening thing is its probably both.

    By the Māori Party’s own proclamations, the number of Māori in New Zealand total anywhere up to 20% of the population. So why do they think their 3% party vote allows them to speak on behalf of all Māori? It doesn’t.

    The Coalition Government’s Cabinet has the largest number of Māori on record.

    Just because the Māori Party arrogantly choose to walk into parliament with Huia feathers on their heads and use every speech to repeat ‘colonisation’, ‘oppression’, and ‘white man’s guilt’, doesn’t give them a claim to speak on behalf of Māori – nor do the majority of Māori want them to.

    Great Māori leaders of the past like Carroll, Ngata, Pomare, and Buck believed in representing all Māori across New Zealand with a pan-Māori view – working together with all New Zealanders. The Māori Party today are saying “if you are Māori and don’t think like us you aren’t really Māori.”

    It shows just how far down the ‘race-based rabbit hole’ these cultural Marxists are willing to take New Zealand and how the media have let them get away with it.

    They don’t want democracy, they want anarchy – headed by their Māori elitist cronies turning this country into something akin to apartheid. They would justify this of course because “Māori have superior DNA” as Co-Leader Rawiri Waititi not only said but arrogantly tried to justify.

    Kapa-Kingi: Accuses the government of wanting to “exterminate Māori”, of saying the government has theories of “white supremacy”, that the government is saying “we should all be white people”, and government policy is because of “racism and Pakeha supremacy”.

    Mainstream media reaction: Zero.

    The fact is the Māori Party doesn’t care what they say or how they say it – not least of which is because they get away with it.

    The good thing is they are nowhere near government – nor will they ever be.

    New Zealand First is going to stop this sort of separatist hate-filled agenda.

    New Zealand is one country and one people.



  9. No Sex Tonight 😥
    I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
    FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says “I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.”
    I said “WHAT??!! What was that?!”
    So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear… “You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.” She responded to my puzzled look by saying, “Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?” Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
    The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said let’s get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you…she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, “That’s fine, honey.” She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
    Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, “I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.” I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, “No honey, I don’t feel like it.” Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled—-WHAT?” I then said “honey, I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial means as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.” And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, “Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?”
    Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either. Women……!



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