HomeLifestyleOn A Personal issue

On A Personal issue

Author

Date

Category

Never walk around at night without turning on the lights.

I had to go and check the 3d printer was working correctly the other night. It was in the middle of a 21 hour print, and I wanted to check it was going okay.

The hallway door was half closed and walked into it. Blood was everywhere. After cleaning it up, got back to bed and didn’t get much sleep.

 

On an even more personal note, I was deeply insulted when Mrs holy handed me the world’s smallest condom. (That is an AAA battery next to it).

It’s just as well I wasn’t in hospital.

Nurses (usually) don’t laugh

“Of course I won’t laugh,” said the Nurse to the patient, “I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never laughed at a patient.”

“Okay then,” said Bob, and he proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the smallest adult male organ the Nurse had ever seen in her life.

In length and width it was almost identical to a AAA battery.

Unable to control herself, the Nurse tried to stop a giggle, but it just came out. And then she started laughing at the fact that she was laughing. Feeling very badly that she had laughed at the man’s private part, she composed herself as well as she could.
“I am so sorry,” she said , “I don’t know what came over me. On my honor as a Nurse and a lady, I promise that it won’t happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?”

“It’s swollen,” Bob replied.

She ran out of the room.

Previous article
Next article

18 COMMENTS

  1. Just goes to prove that first thoughts can be wrong. Here I was thinking you had been caught looking through key holes Chris.

    Hope the old eyeball comes right and is not too painful.

    11

    0

  2. I can relate to walking into a half closed door at night. Thankfully it was my forehead that took the brunt, but the pain still took a bit of time to subside. Not a nice thing to have happen.

    9

    0

  3. what Eds not telling us is the condom was still too big 🙂 and there was no half open door but has finally learnt to fold the laundry the way mrs holy demands it be done.

    anyways Ed, how are you liking your 3d printer, made anything interesting yet and did your top secret experiment work or are you back to the drawing board?

    11

    0

  4. That’s a convoluted story to explain a black eye; along with a big distraction
    Sounds like you are using Golriz as your story adviser !!!

    Simple solution
    Put some light sensitive glow lights in the house.
    Plug in and they do their work. Come on at night/when it is dark.
    Dont need to turn on lights at night where there is a big contrast between light and dark.
    I have three in the house.
    $10 or so at Bunnings -Arlec- but picked up 6 cheapos for 50c each- $3 total – at Kmart 2 years ago

    2

    1

  5. Not so bad on amoon,it night.
    Install a street light for better protection.
    Condoms don’t yet have lights on them well not that size according to the supplier.

    I have heard that the gifted fella’s that need extra large sized condoms can get them with lights on so they can be seen in the ladies eyes.

    2

    0

Recent posts

New mRNA For Bird Flu

Have Your Say

Monday Fun

Have Your Say

Recent comments

Harvey on Have Your Say
Editor on Have Your Say
Editor on Have Your Say
freethinker on Have Your Say
Editor on Have Your Say
freethinker on Have Your Say
Francis on Have Your Say
I am a stupid boy on Have Your Say

Pike is our weekly review of the most popular posts and comments seen on YSB in the past week.
Hamilton
broken clouds
16.7 ° C
16.7 °
16.7 °
90 %
2.4kmh
74 %
Tue
17 °
Wed
13 °
Thu
13 °
Fri
12 °
Sat
13 °
NZD - New Zealand Dollar
USD
1.6205
EUR
1.7510
AUD
1.0773
CAD
1.1793
GBP
2.0720
JPY
0.0103
CNY
0.2235
INR
0.0194