The Waterton Chronicle
Having recently learned that China and Japan are in fact different countries, Supreme Leader Jacinda Ardern has revealed she will channel BFF and fellow champagne socialist Prime Minister Justin Trudeau with a “blackface” ensemble at the All Blacks game this Saturday.
Speaking from what a hastily set up working group has assured Jacinda is indeed Japan and not China, the Vogue fashion model said she was “impressed by Justin’s inclusiveness” referring to the Canadian PM’s slightly controversial choice to paint his face black for a fancy-dress party just 18 years ago.
“Yeah I think it’s a great way for white people to show their love for brown people” she explained, apparently completely missing the point.
“Although I will say that I wouldn’t support it if Trump, or Boris, or Scott Morrison or Soimon Bridges did it, because they’re alt-right fascists, so it would definitely be racist if they did it.” she added.
This reporter also took the opportunity to ask Jacinda how she managed to forget which country she was in following her earlier comments.
“I mean, it’s tricky when you travel as much as I do. I’ve been on holiday travelling around the world pretty much since Winston gave me the job, so I sometimes forget where I am”.
“Anyway, they kind of look the same don’t they?” she added for some reason.
She should have asked Twitford how to tell the difference between those Chinkies